In the pink, and not in a good way

As I blogged about two years ago, there is a local business that likes to mix Halloween and Breast Cancer Awareness Month in hideous fashion, namely pink pumpkins and witches that look like there were hung during the Salem trials.

The 2010 display
Pinktober 2010

This year they seem to run out of witches to persecute, so they’ve moved onto flamingos and gigantic pigs.

The 2012 display

Pinktober

Pink pumpkins and flamingos

This tableaux is so hideous that I have to wonder if they do it ironically or if they really have no idea how ugly their front yard is. When I was a kid, the house at the end of the street I lived on always went all out for Christmas. They had reindeer on the roof, inflatable Santas, animatronic elves, and enough Christmas lights that you could see their house from space. I never missed the turn for my street in the month of December, though I did almost collide with parked gawkers regularly. I’m pretty sure they knew their display was gaudy, and they did it because they loved it anyway. I don’t get that vibe from this display. I think they are clueless. I’m glad I don’t drive past this stretch of road that often now that I’ve moved to a new apartment. I kind of wish some college students would steal everything in the middle of that night as a fraternity prank.

I also recognize that it is ironic to write a post slamming something when just last week I went on about how we should compliment people more often. I am a hypocrite complex woman, ok?

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Jennifer • October 23, 2012 at 10:02 am

Uh, no, you are merely telling it like it is in this case. W. T. H. ???????? How does ANYONE ever wake up in the morning and decide PINK PUMPKINS and FLAMINGOS. TOGETHER. Are a “good idea”???

You are definitely NOT a hypocrite, dear. We ALL get a by on this one…

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Monica • October 23, 2012 at 1:38 pm

My husband took a light-up Christmas flamingo that wears a Santa hat, cut off the Santa hat, stuck a fake human skull over the head of the flamingo, and installed it on the roof. It’s sitting next to a light-up Frankenstein and, lest you think we’ve lost our minds, the rest of our Halloween decorations are very much in canon (black cats, Jack-o-lanterns, etc.).

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JenFul • October 23, 2012 at 4:17 pm

I feel like I’m supposed to pin the tail on the pig, or throw darts at it or something. Or maybe just shoot it since it’s so mutantly huge.

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Leigh • October 23, 2012 at 9:58 pm

No, you are not a hypocrite. The pigs and flamingos are hideous. There might be a website you could submit a picture too, hideous holiday displays dot comm or something. Send them the link, maybe they will take the hint. Really, their lawn is revolting.

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Chocolate & Vicodin: My Quest for Relief from the Headache that Wouldn't Go Away Half-Assed: A Weight-Loss Memoir

Jennette Fulda tells stories to the Internet about her life as a smartass, writer, chronic headache sufferer, (former?) weight-loss inspiration, and overall nice person (who is silently judging you). She was formerly known as PastaQueen. You can contact her if you promise to be nice.

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